Friday, 11 May 2012

More than OK.

Well that was a bit hairy....

And we still aren't out of the woods yet as Husband has to get a new job. BUT things are looking up. Firstly, after a weekend of hell (my last post deleted by accident - the 'It can only get better one' as I have this new browser thing that supports my blog - and it is SHITE! And I can't seem to attach things or bold words or the like... and I delete things by accident, but anyway....) my old work rang me and offered me a 4 month contract - which is a HUGE relief. It means I have sanity again working, I get to hang out with old work buddies and I bring home some much needed bacon. I just hope Husband gets something soon or we are a tad buggered as my wages won't cover all outgoings... But let's cross those bridges when we get to them. Not there just yet.

Being back at my old job has been wonderful. I miss some folk that used to be there - but the office is a calmer place than when I went back the last time (when I was wildly pregnant). I know the job inside out - so it isn't too scary getting my old grey matter working again. I can't tell you how lovely it is to make others tea, gossip round the breakout area and catch up on other peoples' lives. I am genuinely grateful to be back - and it felt more than lovely when folk said it was good to have me there again. I had missed the place.

Then a friend from across the pond got in touch with an idea - and I have been following that up. Gawd bless Monica for being such a support in my dark old days. When someone pays it forward - helps you for no gain of their own - well, nothing shows more kindness and humanity. There is a marked difference between those that genuinely want to help - and the odd folk who just want to leech upon your unhappiness - feeding their own insecurities. And yes, those people exist! But the ones who really care - my school buddies wives, my schoolmates, a dear friend in LA, all your blog readers - well you all swell my heart. Because at your lowest ebb, all you have to share is your misery - and only true friends want to hear that!

Finally, I watched a documentary on Great Ormond Street hospital this week. It featured children with cancer. Brave little ones and their devastated, hopeful, resiliant parents. It more than humbled me. It made me as we say in Ireland 'wind my neck in.' Yes everything is relative. Yes money worries are hideous. But you are nothing without your health. As long as my family and friends are well, as long as I have food on the table - life will be ok. Things will work out in the end. The worst rarely happens. For these poor people, the worst was already happening and yet they remained so brave, so positive. Sometimes we need to look beyond ourselves to see how lucky we really are. I am trying to remember this - to not lose sight of all I have, rather than focusing on all I have not.

Thank you for all your suggestions re: my work. I am still looking in to them as in 4 months, I still need to have work of sorts. I have some time to try and sort this.

So all in all, things are more than ok. :)


Anonymous said...

I'm so pleased for you that things are on the up. A small but much needed interlude. Bless you CM. x

Liz said...

Ah! So glad Monica had a solution! An idea!So glad you have some work, for now!

My friend wrote me on FB about how I posted gratitude when it was only a money problem - and I did. It was a BIG money problem - oh my word we will suffer from that hit for ages. BUT it wasn't my kid having cancer. And as I watch my kid suffer from my mom's cancer, I know the difference.

Money troubles are dreadful - and I hate the perspective game, where people tell you others have it worse. You are entitled to your bad, to be upset about it. Still, it's nice when we ourselves see it - see our bad as less awful.

Anonymous said...

That is excellent news! I'm not one for banal platitudes, but things do have a way of working out.

Caroline said...

Yay! I am new to your blog - got sent here by (which I adore) and the first post I read was the one from 21st April. Yikes. You sounded so completely down and finished... this is SUCH good news! Of course money worries are totally ghastly, that panicky, all-consuming fear I know so well, but it's the outside interaction and return to the working world that is worth virtually as much. Very good news, keep us posted!