Tuesday, 21 December 2010

Cliches galore

I am ALIVE!! Yes I am - but oh my god, my life has descended into a nose/bottom/vomit wipe/white laundry wash/ burpathon cliche that is indeed parenthood to a newborn. I had forgotten how hard it all is - which is good, because if I had remembered, Sproglette wouldn't be here. Oh to sleep. To curl up in a warm bed and wake of my own accord feels like the best xmas gift anyone could ever give me.... And just when I think Sproglette is asleep and I may have moment to fold all the white washes/unstack dishwasher and all the other glamorous jobs that my life has become - Sproglet needs something or other - feeding or bathing or dressing or entertaining - and getting dressed before midday is the most successful part of my day.

I am every cliche and more. I want to tell you about the fact that the day my daughter was born was one of the worst and best of my life - I was bumped 5 times from my section for emergencies and I didn't have her until 6:14pm - after being nil by mouth all day. I want to talk about Sproglet's reaction to his Sis and how his wee insecure face reduced me to tears every day. Or how brilliant my Husband has been and how this 2 week cocoon we have been in has been some of the best weeks of our married life. but no, as I type, Sproglette has woken from a short slumber on a sheepskin blanket on the floor. Sproglet is stroking her tiny perfect head and is calling her 'my baby.' I feel like my life has been turned on it's head. I am not sure of my name, but I know I like drinking port.

Must dash - more to follow. When? Anyone's guess. Merry Xmas y'all xxx

Thursday, 9 December 2010

Sproglette has arrived!!

My beautiful daughter Riley is here!

7lbs 1oz at 6:14 pm on Mon 6th Dec. Spent the whole day waiting to go into theatre... Got home last night. Lots to share, if only I had the mental capacity. At the moment it is hard to remember my name. Or think of Riley's middlle name. I am smitten, sore, excited, emotional and beyond tired. Will blog soon. Just wanted to share my good news.

Friday, 3 December 2010

Me and Sproglet

Sproglet and I have been sharing bath time of late. Bless him, he loves it - even though I am a beached whale, taking up three quarters or more of the tub and somehow trapping his bath toys underneath my girth. We chat about school and Santa and 'Alan' calendars - with gems about 'At school we heard about Mary and Joseph and baby Jesus, but at nursery the other day I found out about the bad kings who want to kill baby Jesus. Why would a king want to kill a baby?' Fair comment... Anyway, the other night he piped up with 'I was a baby in your tummy and I came out and Daddy cried, and now you have another baby in your tummy.' I felt a big lump in my throat rise up and I explained that no matter about the new baby - he would always be my special boy. He nodded sagely then threw his arms around my bump.

For so long it has been me and him: when I used to fly to Ireland for my show every weekend when he was 4 months old; trips to Belfast and York to see relatives; the whole time I was out of work trying to become a script ed; our movies afternoons and playdates - it has been just the two of us. Suddenly as I lifted a mound of ever growing bubbles from his wee head - it hit me, that it would never be the same again. I felt this ridiculous sadness. Don't get me wrong, I'm over the moon to give him a sibling - something I never had - but I just felt this inexplicable loss. I pulled him close to me and kissed his wet cheek. He has been the biggest joy and surprise of my life - filled some lost void inside me that churned for years until his arrival. He makes me laugh more than anyone else and fills me with a pride that only parents can appreciate. I thought I'd upload some pics of my time so far with my beautiful son.

Finn, I love you.