Wednesday, 12 November 2014



I am in a ferociously bad mood. I am certain it is PMT. Soon, soon this will be a thing of the past. But until then, until I start taking the contraceptive pill (whoop) and my life miraculously becomes a zen white company Xmas advert, I am going to vent at all the niggley little things that are pissing me off. Feck gratuity lists, right now I am all about the GRRRR. If you want joy, go watch the John Lewis advert. For all else, here goes:

1. The weather. Rain - no sun, no grey no cold no mild. MAKE UP YOUR MIND and just put us into the depths of grim winter - where no one smiles, there is no point in attempting to style hair and everyone pokes each other in the eye with umbrellas and spits bile about delayed trains and leaves on tracks.

2. Xmas adverts. FUCK OFF it is NOVEMBER! I don't care that Boots has glitter and John Lewis has penguins and we should all be buying Links jewellery and thick musky scents. Come back in December when I may feel more inclined. Why is everyone rushing to finish the year already? We barely have passed Halloween!!

3. People who pretend to be in my life and talk of meet ups that never happen - please don't even keep trying. We both don't care about meeting up or else we would have done it in the 2 years (or more) since we met up. All that 'we must meet!' emails is a cowardly way to try and remain in touch with people you long stopped caring about. Ending the charade is preferable. Don't you think so? Exactly.

4. I am so fed up feeling like some tragic failure every time someone genuinely wants to meet up. People, I left my job in Feb. NO INCOME. Husband supporting us both as I try to change careers. It is a slow process and leaves me with precious little income from blogging - so dinners, drinks, dancing and festivities are all glorious - and most 40+ year olds I know are on 60K plus salaries a year - so this is nothing - but for me it is impossible. I'm not avoiding you - I just can't afford to pay £40 for dinner and then drinks and taxis and all the rest. It is my choice, and whilst I'm not thrilled with it - it means more to me to be around for my kids and try to find a job solution around their schooling. I am bored of being broke. So bored of it I will never mention it again. But if I aint running to have festivities with you - don't make me feel bad - I feel bad enough as it is.

5. Teachers' pay. This one just makes me filled with rage. I talked to my son's teacher about the hours she puts in - and when you think of all the class preparation and marking and reports and all - and divide the hours teachers work with what they earn - along with nurses and service folk - it makes me fuming. Yet Wayne Rooney who is as thick as mince can buy diamonds daily - the world IS MAD. Our priorities in life are seriously screwed when the folk who are shaping the minds of our children are not worth more £££. remember your favourite teacher - the one who discovered you were great at art? Or maths? Who encouraged you like no other, who understood the peer pressure you felt or the fact you didn't fit in or whatever? Those who teach deserve awards and praise because it is a challenge and beyond a job.

6. It is interesting at times of your life, when you aren't your usual self - when you need help from others: be it support or shoulder to cry on, or someone to offer career advice, or to say 'I'll buy you a beer and cheer you up.' Because there are those who you expect to be there for you and suddenly they are not. Yet there are those who you never imagined you could turn to and they surprise you by being brilliant. These past few months have been an eye opener - I have turned to unexpected people who have been completely AMAZING (I genuinely love these folk) and then there are those who have only been interested in their own issues. It has been beyond enlightening. You live and learn, even at 41.

7. I saw Nightcrawler and whilst Jake Gyllenhaal is amazing - and ridiculously creepy - it is actually a wildly depressing film. Clever yes, and verging on smug as it pats itself on the back for making the point that TV people are just as vile as those who prey on the carcasses of car crashes and robberies and shootings for their dollar. You can imagine the smile on the director's face as he says, 'yes, but he doesn't NEED to go on a journey, or change - that, that is precisely my point.' Very clever yes. Satisfying? No. Hollow and over long and the shadow of the fabulous film it could have been? Yes. Oh and Rene Russo - why the botox - why???

8. I'm still enraged. Hopefully screaming at the twats on the Apprentice will abate this PMT. Because if there is ever anything to make you feel better about yourself it is watching these numbskulls try and out shout each other. Hilarious.

9. The price of stamps. For SNAIL MAIL!!!! That is all.

10. Birthdays. Do we really need one a year? I move for bi-annual birthdays. We'd all be younger, happier and have more cash. Result.

There - now write your own GRRRR list.  It feels better, really does.

(*Sorry. Blame my PMT)

1 comment:

SantaKrus said...

This is like something I'd write. Never mock me again for moaning ;P