Tuesday, 10 March 2015

Lunar Tempo

I can hardly walk, bend down or climb stairs. I am THRILLED.

I am back at the gym. Back in the hands of sweet Paul with the nice eyes who makes me hurt from every possible muscle. I think I love him. That, combined with body combat and the fact the sun is shining and my endless period has ended - has made me, to quote Pharrell - Happy.

Thank god for sunshine and for throwing one's body around in bizarre contorted shapes, because it will be the salvation of me. I have managed through alcohol, cake and a lot of bread,  oh and crisps - goddamn them - to put on 8 pounds since the start of December. Now, off they must come.

Exercise not only helps my heart and my stomach, it also helps my mind. Which is why I invested in a brand spanking new pair of trainers that will arrive later today. I think I may love them as much as my children. Stepping into them, I will feel like a new person. One who will enjoy running. One who likes a lunge. Not at a man I may add. They shout 'she exercises' and look like the kind of thing athletes or those who know how to lift a kettle bell wear. Nike lunar tempo. Almost poetic eh? In them I will become a new woman. One who likes blisters and has firm thighs.

When I get them I know it will look like a elephant putting on some ballet slippers. It is that much of a paradox. But over time, we will become one, this shoe and I. I will eventually earn the right to wear them.

For Mothers day I am asking for stretchy legging things instead of a cake and flowers. Most of all I need new headphones. (Although I did read a disturbing article today that runners with headphones are more likely to be attacked).

I have 5 weeks to lose ten pounds and become ready for summer - so that when I discard those jumpers there will be a normal human being underneath. A firmer one than there is now for sure. Day 2 of no sugar and bread and rice and pasta and spuds and all the joyous white food that exists. I'm going pretty good - even though Husband dramatically opposes every SINGLE thing my trainer has said about diet. Trainer thinks I should just be a panda (look at the size of those fuckers) and eat plants and not much else. Husband thinks that is wrong and you need meat as your protein source to build muscle. He mocks trainer - and whilst I am desperately wishing he is jealous of me giving my attentions to another man 2 hours a week, it isn't the case.

So trainer Paul says eat lentils and sweet potatoes and no meats - fish is ok - and lots of veg. Husband says fuck that - eat LOTS of meat and veg and cheese and good fats all cooked in coconut oil. I am confused, but at least not reaching for the biscuit tin. Life was simpler though when a bad day could be cured by cake and fine red wine. *Sigh*

I know that this 5 week torture will end, and I cannot go back to my cake guzzling past. I must venture into new pastures. So thank gawd I have my new trainers to take me there....


Courtney said...

hmm, I tend to agree with your husband although I do have to watch my cheese intake because it has so many calories. I think you need good fat for so many things, not the least of which is proper thyroid function. I love lentils and sweet potatoes and vegetables but would definitely need protein and at least healthy oils to make it doable long-term..

Louise said...

Good for you CM. I think they're both right in a way - if you eat as your trainer says you WILL lose weight quickly, but it will feel like a 'diet' and will be very hard to sustain long term. Meat and (full fat) dairy are good protein sources. Unless you have an intolerance I don't think you should cut out any food groups, other than sugar, processed food and refined carbs (your trainer is right about eating good carbs like brown rice, pulses, sweet potato, oats for energy - white rice, bread, pasta all convert so quickly to sugars in your body, you may as well just eat sugar). Fat helps to make you feel full so you are likely to eat less overall. Google HFLC (high fat low carb diet) and you'll find lots of information debunking the myth that animal fats are bad for you. Nuts & seeds are also a great source of proteins and fats. If you crave sweet have some 70%+ dark chocolate. I completely transformed my (post kids, flabby) body eating this way and have kept it off and don't feel deprived at all (I am pretty strict on the sugar though). I still get to enjoy my wine too!
ps. I hope your trainer has taken body fat and body proportion measurements as if you're lifting weights you may not lose lots of weight but your body shape and body fat will really change. Good luck!

Crummy Mummy said...

Thanks Courtney and Louise - helpful tips.. I ma just gone be balanced - avoid refined carbs and white foods. Trainer just weighed me... He should have taken body fat proportions and other measurements - I will measure myself and keep note. Weighing myself every monday xx