Spent the morning talking to Husband - finding some solutions, putting some plans in place. Being a team, instead of opposing sides. Spent the afteroon in a soft play area - think a wonka factory on acid with 5 trillion kids racing around and then some (seventh circle of hell replete with a girl on the entrance desk sporting a face that would turn milk sour, or as my Granny would say 'she had a face like a fried egg's lip'- mind you I would feel that fucking murderous if I worked there...) with Sproglet and his mate and a good friend. Then it was all back to mine for some spag bol and chocolate ice cream. Both of which comforted me.
I think everything just spiralled a bit on Friday. Illness ('orrible flu like bug that felt like my muscles had done 7 rounds with Tyson) combined with the worst period of my life (TMI... sorry) and the fear about job hunting and money and all that jazz just sent me reeling. Anyway, I thank my commenters for being so sympathetic and caring. Whoever said that I light up a room, know that you lit up my day. It is possibly one of the nicest things I have ever heard/read about myself. On dark days I will try and hold that thought. I also found a picture a friend posted on facebook - and it makes me feel better. More positive. And if days like Friday keep a comin' then I'll head back for citalopram - as maybe my hormones post babies, don't work as they should. Chemical, indeed. I needed them once, and may well again.
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