Tuesday 26 February 2013

Overwhelmed, Oscars and on top again...

I AM BACK.

I know you thought I'd never gone away. But I had... Since a week ago on Monday I have been inhabited by an alien lurgy being - that made me exhausted, ill and downright depressed. It started that Monday night - I felt overly tired, sore muscled, not really myself. But I refused to accept in any way that I was ill. I don't get ill. The whole winter had practically passed and not even a sniff of a cold....

My Mum was over helping with the kids over the half term hols, and I kept saying I must get out and see a movie while she was here to babysit - but could I get out the door? I just fell into bed every night - utterly exhausted. Not feeling right at all. You know when you can't quite put your finger on it - but you feel are on the verge of collapsing into a sweaty sore heap?

Wed night I jumped into a roasting bath  determined to rid myself of this demon possessing me. But, on leave the next day - I couldn't get out of bed. I felt so weak and cold to my very bones, I wrapped myself in jumpers and scarves and duvets and still - I couldn't get warm. My Mum had to leave, getting a taxi to the airport and I actually wept, I wished she could stay so badly. It doesn't matter how old you are - when you are ill, there is nothing as great as your Mum bringing you soup and water and buying you oranges to squeeze. Once she had gone, I still had children to take care of. To bathe and feed and put to bed. There is NOTHING as difficult as trying to parent when you are sweating out poison and your head feels like it is in vice.

Friday was Sproglet's big day out in London: the London Eye and the Tower of London. I'd been so excited about our family day out... but I couldn't go. Sproglet cried - which made me in flu-induced, weak as kitten state, also cry. I know! get it together woman! But I couldn't. I lay on the sofa watching 'Death Becomes Her' feeling every bit as rough and Meryl and Goldie (post elixir drink, 10 years on...).

Saturday and sunday continued in the same vein. I don't think I dressed for 2 days. I didn't recognise myself when I passed a mirror. Husband was shocked at the voracity of my cough (a by-product of the flu thing). I'm asthmatic - my lungs are my achielles heel. I hacked and spluttered until I thought a throbbing lung was going to shoot out onto the table in front of me. Regularly I almost threw up. Nasty. Husband tried to keep out of my way, declaring me the grumpiest ill person he had ever had to deal with. He did conceed he hadn't heard me cough so badly since he had known me. A trip to the docs on Monday confirmed that the 'virus' I had pretty much worked through, had left me a lung choking present. She prescribed steroids and rest.

There comes a point, when you really have watched all the Tv that you can. Third Man (not as amazing as I expected. Yes, I know Orsen Wells is in it - but still), Nashville (more on that another time) and  Oscars!! Thank god for the red carpet. Honestly, when you are in a crumpled heap - there is nothing better than watching US 'hosts' tell stars how fabulous they are and how they want each and every one of them to win - and 'WHO ARE YOU WEARING?'  Lots of carnival floats and bullet nipple frocks and glitter - and so much BOTOX. Zeta Jones, is that you? Hiding in amongst that make-up and facial 'work? And Zellweger - dear god, it is a wonder the woman can eat - her face is so, so... solid. Glassily smooth and utterly terrifying. Thank god for 2 people: Jennifer Lawrence (a breath of fresh air - she has a personality, and humour and sounds pretty normal) and the divine Ben Affleck. His speech was so raw and honest, I just wanted to him a hug, nevermind an Oscar. Bless him for saying marriage is work - and barely being able to speak his kids' names, he was so emotional. To admit his failings  (and everyone has career ups and downs - just most don't involve J-Lo) and to be so humble about his richly deserved success, made me champion him all the more.  I loved his line about not holding grudges - an imagine that must have been pretty damn hard to do in a town that had him written off 8 years ago as a Michael Bay has been.

Oh and of course Daniel. Day Lewis is such a lovely man - obviously the best actor of any generation - let alone now. But the rest of the Oscars? Oh I was delighted the beautoful paper man animated short won - I saw it as the starter movie to 'Wreck It Ralph' and is was easily the better of the two movies! (Check it out if you can). But apart from that - Seth? We saw your boobs - really, is that the best you can do? And that over-long Shatner idea that wwas berable for about a minute - and then all that sing-a-long-a-dance debacle. It made me yearn for the John Hughes tributes of past years. Was Ricky Gervais busy or something? Or Tina and Amy? MacFarlane looked uncomfortable - except when he was slagging off our Adele or a Kardashian... The theme of his night? Us women are just second class citizens - I mean, boobs.

Thank gawd for sky plus fast forward as I raced through all the sphincter-clenching presenter chatty bits and listened to the acceptance speeches. My, there are a lot of long haired men who work in movies eh?

Anyway, tonight - 2 days of steroids in, (one to go) and after sucking down enough becotide inhaler juice that I could - I can breathe again. It is so great to breathe without wheezing like some old carthorse. I am not hacking up a lung every 3 minutes. My head not longer throbs, my body no longer aches. It feels great! I really had forgotten just how great it feels to NOT have flu. I am NEVER missing a flu jab in winter ever again. One little prick could have saved all of this...









1 comment:

Shannon b said...

Ugh! I came home early today. Sick!! I'm hoping its nothing like yours! I totally agree about the awards show! Other than the jackass jokes, it was awesome.