Thursday, 25 July 2013

Robin Thicke has a big D**k

Now I know Thea at work told me that I can't write a blog post called the above, but I am.

In case any of you are unacquainted with the video to Blurred Lines, the most infectious of all summer tunes, I shall explain. Amongst women with the most AMAZING boobs of all time galloping about playing with animals and er... huge stuffed dice, there are some silver helium balloons spelling out the title of this blog.

Clearly, Robin has a small penis. Or shares a similar sense of humour as that of a 14 year old boy. Or both.

But, oh god, I REALLY fancy him.

There, I said it. Actually, my work mates hit upon this before I did. It's not unusual for friends to deduce something is happening in my life, long before my blonde self is aware of it. One day they realised that I talked him about often, when really, there is precious little to talk about. Least of all, his video that causes grown women to throw their dinner plates at the TV screen. Why I am attracted to him? I am mystified. Then most attractions cannot be explained can they?

To be honest, my fascination with his 'risque' video was how repetitive and deeply uninspiring it was, for such a catchy song. That, and that brunette girl's boobs. You don't believe me? Check it out.

What makes men think, 'I know, we'll all wear some dashing whistles and let the girls run around in the buff - women will LOVE it!' Because boys, dear children, we won't. It astounds me that Thicke thinks the vid is hilarious, a kind of Benny Hill sketch - a bit of slap and tickle. It astounds me even more that his wife encouraged this - but then, maybe she was shrewd. After all, what woman is going to fancy Thicke after he promotes such blatant sexism?

*blushes.* Let's move on...

Then I read that he has been with the same woman since he was 14 years old and the penny dropped. That, in teenagedom, is clearly where his knowledge of women ended. Where his emotional maturity remains - like a broken thermometer. He genuinely thinks it is funny, and innocent and declares himself a 'gentleman.'

It explains everything - most of all, why he is affronted that women have accused it as being a bit 'rapey,' with the lyrics banging on 'I know you want it' as he describes splitting a girl's ass in two. Thicke refuses to even to dignify this with a response - which usually means, 'I don't have a clue how to respond to that at all.'

Yet, I like him, inexplicably. I love the song and the fact he sweats every time I've seen him sing it. But I am absolutely positive, that Robin Thicke has a small d**k.

Put that in some silver balloons...

  

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Seems someone might be jealous of girls with a decent rack. Beestings perchance?

Anonymous said...

Ahem, from what I've heard you won't get a bigger rack than Crummy Mummy's!

Liz said...

I love him, I love the song and I find the video hilarious. So, I'm right there with you. His wife is gorgeous!

Anonymous said...

" That, and that brunette girl's boobs. " Wow what a rack. But Robin singing "You're far from plastic". Yeah I don not think so. She dances around and they don't bounce, wiggle or anything. Tuff time believing they are not a man made product.

Anyways I just stumbled on his video and did a search for "Robin Thicke has a small d**k and found your little blog. I figured somebody with such a cocky attitude must be over compensating.

Crummy Mummy said...

Oh Anonymous - come back - keep reading! They are Amazing boobs, I agree. I don't think they are fake though. I worked at a tv channel where every other woman had fake tits and I can spot them a mile off....

Anonymous said...

I am still here. Reading some of your other stuff. I have this site saved to my favorites and that does not happen often.

Anyways, real or man made they look great. They were not overdone if fake. I have seen some, under clothes from coworkers... Crazy ones like don't that hurt your back? Then some ones at strip clubs when I was younger. The ones that always made me say wow those are perfect, not too big, not to small, one is not bigger then the other are always fake from my limited experience. And they do not bounce much when moving.

With all the adds, airbrushing even of supermodels. Makeup to conceal. Clothes that reshape and lets face it, sometimes that hot looking chick is a dude. It makes me wonder if that perfect 10 I had in my mind as a teenager is even possible without a little help.

Anyways did not mean to ramble on with my weird thoughts. As for this video. I am surprised more women are not offended by it. But then again I am not offended by the feminist parody of this video that objectifies men. I wonder do the feminist want to piss the average guy off or do they think they are funny?