Take the trash out on your way...

I have a confession for you. Just the one mind. If I confessed all, frankly we'd be here all damn day. I used to be addicted to trash mags. Hello my name is crummymummy, I am 30 something years old and I am addicted to trash mags. My life is unmanageable without trash mags, I have given my life over to trash mags.... you get the picture. I would pretend that they were of no interest to me whatsoever and then sneak into Sainsburies and binge read whilst on route to the gym. It was my guilty pleasure. Like eating ice cream in the bath (no? you've never done it? Hell you don't know what you're missing!) or picking your blackheads it was a habit that is best done alone and kept quiet.

I always glossed over the articles and just relished the pictures - the bags, boozers, bitches, boob jobs and barbies. Pantomime and slightly grotesque - this unrealistic airbrushed celeb worshipping culture. The other day I slunk over to the mag stand to get a fix and (although I had always known this deep down but had chosen to just park it)whilst I perused the usual weekly gossip fests I felt a wave of revulsion wash over me. These headlines dominate: Too Fat! Too skinny! Stop working out! Stars battle of the bulge! Cellulite! Muffin tops! You're wearing that? Worst look of the week!Knobbly knees! Has she had surgery? Worst boobs!

There were options to vote which of two women looked better in the same outfit; whether or not Cheryl should take Ashley back and if Victoria Beckham was a good mother or not. What the fuck is going on? Why are we reading this shite, even in jest or just to see who wore what at the Oscars? Why in the world are we comparing two women - who both look amazing, who both look happy, and judging that one has to look better than the other? Who are we to decide who is a good mother/wife/friend etc. Fair enough to debate the talents (or lack of) - after all, that is the trade that they sell - like we would discuss if a plumber was any good, or of you should eat at this or that restaurant. But to judge a woman we have never met on her private life and the choices she makes in it - who do we think we are???!! Eternally pitting women against each other in order to make ourselves feel better - sucks. It was like the truth screamed out at me and jumped out of every page. These magazines criticise and vilify and amplify every small quirk - however natural - in a woman's body for us to eat up with glee that their 'perfect' lives aren't so damn perfect after all. I shut the mag and walked off. Life is too short. Way too short for such sloppy journalism, non entity adulation, narcissism and women bashing.

I'll find a new vice, just give me til Tuesday...